You're Only Scared To Die, When You Ain't Living Right...

traffic in LA

sometimes its all I can do
to drive past your off-ramp
and not go to your room
and put on your clothes
that are scratchy with concrete bits
and lace up your weathered concrete covered boots
that i know won't fit

and then flop on the floor
watching the construction dust
settle on my heart as I breathe it in deeply

wishing you were on a job
or fixing the alignment
or at the store
cause someone said just get me one thing

some days its all i can do
not to will myself to die
they say death waits in the shadows
but i've checked those shadows
and i can't find death

dammit, where is it when i need it
cause where most fear meeting their end
i only wish it came sooner
i'd look death in the eye
greet it like a lost friend

i've been waiting
i'll say
i'll run ahead
and run towards you
and leap out
and tackle you
and you'll laugh

but until then
know that i am
waiting in your room
picking chunks of concrete off
your faded shirt
and trying to fit my big feet in
your smaller boots
watching the dust settle