Recently in Rant & Rave Category
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I should have been expecting them. What was I thinking?
The crazy hours I've spent at work, the smoke filled air that I've been getting my oxygen from, the unreasonable amounts of all sorts of 80 proof liquids that have gone inside of me in the name of entertainment and boredom.
And yet, when they returned, the demons that always lurked behind me, with a vengeance - laughing, patting me on the head, throwing me about in the air for a bit of fun, all this while I shook and hid and feigned ignorance from their presence - I was still surprised. I always think that when they leave that they leave forever. But I am always wrong, every single time.
I couldn't hide. So I did what they wanted, I indulged them while trying to rein myself back into a field that would somehow comfort me, rather than chide me for my mistakes yet again.
What am I to do, however? What should I do about the life that I very much want to lead, the life that I very much need to lead, the life that I have been handed, while there are innocent children dying daily in my home country, in China, in Africa, in South America, in the world?
The fact that I am obsessed with trivial matters, that my insignificant worries and problems have nothing to do with the greater good that I want to achieve and the fact that I long to very much be an ignorant person. Again, that makes me feel guilty for who would wish that upon themselves, if they really wanted to achieve greater good in the world.
I am Jill's conscious - torn between the party and the good cause.
I should have been expecting them. What was I thinking?
The crazy hours I've spent at work, the smoke filled air that I've been getting my oxygen from, the unreasonable amounts of all sorts of 80 proof liquids that have gone inside of me in the name of entertainment and boredom.
And yet, when they returned, the demons that always lurked behind me, with a vengeance - laughing, patting me on the head, throwing me about in the air for a bit of fun, all this while I shook and hid and feigned ignorance from their presence - I was still surprised. I always think that when they leave that they leave forever. But I am always wrong, every single time.
I couldn't hide. So I did what they wanted, I indulged them while trying to rein myself back into a field that would somehow comfort me, rather than chide me for my mistakes yet again.
What am I to do, however? What should I do about the life that I very much want to lead, the life that I very much need to lead, the life that I have been handed, while there are innocent children dying daily in my home country, in China, in Africa, in South America, in the world?
The fact that I am obsessed with trivial matters, that my insignificant worries and problems have nothing to do with the greater good that I want to achieve and the fact that I long to very much be an ignorant person. Again, that makes me feel guilty for who would wish that upon themselves, if they really wanted to achieve greater good in the world.
I am Jill's conscious - torn between the party and the good cause.
I've been suffering from writer's block for a little over a year now. I seriously can't even write essays, or blog posts without a reason. I mean i used to love writing stories and poetry. Then somewhere along the way, I got very depressed and even though depression might be a good thing for some writers, it took away every ounce of confidence that I had left and I would sit at the computer, not writing, staring, writing, deleting, etc. And because I can't write, things keep getting piled up in my heart and in my head, leaving yours truly in an even worse condition then before. But I have decided that I should just do it anyway because writing is something that I love to do. I mean, I think about the jobs I've had and I know why I always quit at the end because I don't love it love it. Writing is the only thing that keeps me sane and if I can't write, I'm not sure how long I can keep up the facades of sanity.
Anyway, the Fashion blog voguefactory where Xiaowen and I used to blog at was shut down due to legal ramifications (big fish Vogue ordered a cease and desist letter!) and now we are back at www.fash-eccentric.com.
And when I saw we - I mean X-wen and her friend Terrence did all the moving of the blog. I'm pretty useless technologically speaking.We even have a new blogger for Fashion Eccentric - Lawrence who will blog about men fashion and technology, so there is something for everyone!
I havne't yet started blogging on Fash-E! but only because X-wen already blogged about everything I love. hahahaha. OK, so look out for more stuff from Yangon Thu (politically, fictionally and non-fictionally) and from Fash-E! (fashionably eccentric).
xoxo,
M
Have you seen the movie The Hunting Party starring RIchard Gere and Terence Howard? No? Then you absolutely must rush to the theaters/DVD rental places to watch it right now, this very minute. The movie manages to portray heart, realism, witty satire, friendship, tragedy, dirty politics, war, aftermath of war - all at the very same time.
The movie didn't get rave reviews from all the critics but you know, it got to me. I mean, after all, why are most of the war criminals still alive and "hiding". How come we can wage wars for years but can't catch a man? Besides, getting to see buildings all shot up in the now peaceful SaraJevo - I mean it's a rather priceless reminder of what war can do. Watch the trailer here:
So, I'm rather inspired! Shall we go on a hunting party for Than Shwe? What shall we do after we find him?
IMDB synopsis for the movie:
How can they find the world's most wanted war criminal when the C.I.A. can't? [by actually looking]A young journalist (Eisenberg), a seasoned cameraman (Howard) and a discredited journalist (Gere) embark on an unauthorized mission to find the no. 1 war criminal in Bosnia; they find themselves in serious jeopardy when they are mistaken as a CIA hit squad and their target decides to come after them.
The movie didn't get rave reviews from all the critics but you know, it got to me. I mean, after all, why are most of the war criminals still alive and "hiding". How come we can wage wars for years but can't catch a man? Besides, getting to see buildings all shot up in the now peaceful SaraJevo - I mean it's a rather priceless reminder of what war can do. Watch the trailer here: So, I'm rather inspired! Shall we go on a hunting party for Than Shwe? What shall we do after we find him?
