indecisions

I can't decide if my favorite breakfast if Steamed white rice mixed with steamed Pepout (Asian Beans that are kinda like dahl but more beany) with a sprinkle of oil and salt

or

if it is what I try to make in a mad dash before I go off to work: wheat pita bread toasted with cheese and with a sprinkle of salsa and avocado and sometimes, i'll put eggs and meat in it.

Sometimes, i can't figure out if everyone is just bipolar

or

if the good and the bad just balances everyone out and you have to take everything with a grain of salt.

I can't deicde if the Christmas crowd bothers me ----A huge number of people walking around me in a rush to get somewhere, buy something, always kind of put me off because I spent my formative years in Singapore where that was normal, everyday thing to do. For some reason, being surrounded by this many people makes me feel so alone. Not lonely, just alone.

or

if it makes me feel good to know that in a couple of days, so many people will be smiling up to their ears as they open their perfect presents or grimacing and putting on that reindeer sweater their thrid cousin from the uncle side.

And, I can't decide if I'm happy that it's been so hot in Los Angeles these past few days

or

if I'm kinda disappointed that the millions of sweaters that I accumulated in the Bay Area, are rendered useless except for looking pretty in my tiny closet.

And I couldn't decide if I should keep this blog of indecisions away from prying eyes

or

If I should publish it.
but I did.
If only life was easier